Free of prejudice?!

Is that me or maybe not? Do I still harbour prejudices that have been unconsciously passed on to me by society, even though I've lived here for so long?

Why is it...

We were at the beach recently. I finally decided to go into the sea for the first time in four weeks. My partner decided to wait outside in the beach bar and enjoy a cosy end to the afternoon. So I went into the lukewarm sea on my own, well, refreshment in the sea is definitely not the case here.

I bobbed along, because even proper swimming is an impossibility. All around me were other "swimmers", mainly Kenyans and occasionally a Muzungu with his partner, but they were all a bit distant from me.

I was lost in thought and enjoying the peace and quiet around me when I suddenly heard a voice approaching me from the right. It was a young man in his floating tyre - you can hire large floating tyres all over the beach - and he asked me if I could swim and wasn't afraid. I replied yes, I can swim and no, I'm not afraid. He then asked if I could teach him to swim and if he could come over to swim with me. I explained to him what he should do and said that I would really like to swim on my own now.

Five minutes later, a lively young man came trotting into the water, also at a great distance. He shouted, "Hello!" in my direction and I replied. This was followed by five exchanges about how I was doing, and at some point I had to reply whether everything was OK with him, because I had already said five times that I was fine. The next answer was yes, thank you and I should come to him because he wants to be with me. I politely declined and then got back, "I want to be your husband!".  I then explained to him that my husband was waiting outside and wasn't happy with his behaviour. He didn't quite believe me and at that moment I saw my partner walking towards the sea. I went outside and "my self-proclaimed new boyfriend" was nowhere to be found.

I can now cope very well with these encounters and take them in my stride, but then I had an encounter the next day at the same spot on the beach that really threw me for a loop and got me thinking.

I stood at the edge of the water and enjoyed the twilight atmosphere. Completely absorbed in my thoughts again, I noticed a young Kenyan woman coming in my direction. She came quite close to me and my first reaction was to take my mobile phone and put it in my skirt pocket on the other side. I was startled by my reaction, because we were already driving through areas where my window was open and I'd better close it, and suddenly here on the beach I was afraid that a young woman would snatch my mobile phone away from me?

The young woman came closer and closer to me and when I took a step backwards, she did the same. After what felt like an eternity, she asked me out of nowhere if she could take a picture with me. We took a photo together and then we talked for a good 10 minutes. The young woman simply didn't know how best to approach me. We had an optimal and nice exchange, and at some point I said goodbye because it was getting dark.

I was absolutely perplexed by my thoughts and myself, because if a man had spoken to me like that, it would have been something I was already used to and I didn't give it a second thought, but as soon as it was a young woman, I started to sweat and assume things that you just hear as soon as someone says I'm going to Africa now.